Today was a good day! Kurt and I slept til 12:00 noon! It was so lazy of us, but he hasn't gotten to sleep in in WEEKS, and I am not exactly one to get up at 6 am to start breakfast, so we let ourselves be lazy this morning. I actually had a really bad dream (well...my version of a nightmare) about Kurt and one of his ex girlfriends (it was totally bizarre and ridiculous, yet really upsetting) and I woke up at 8 really rattled. Kurt was barely coherent and couldnt even comfort me, so I fell back asleep. It's amazing how real dreams can be. We laughed about it later, because Kurt told me "I knew you were having a bad dream because you were hitting me repeatedly." (I did not know I was doing this!) Anyway....we had cinnamon rolls for breakfast and went to the Tour of Homes with my mom and sister. We really had a good time, and the weather was beautiful. We came home and had more lazy time. Well, I did. Kurt went running and I could NOT, yet again, get motivated for this test on Monday. I promise, normally I'm better than this, and it's kind of scary how apathetic I'm acting towards this textiles test. I guess we all have our slacker moments. I did study for about 30-45 minutes tonight....I dont know that I retained much, but I tried. I have been getting good use out of our Netflix subscription. I finished up tonight a popular TV series (yes, I have watched all 6 seasons, and no, I will not say which TV show because I will be judged). It's amazing how you can get attached to a TV show and its characters. That's why I like renting whole seasons at a time...you get immersed in the characters' lives and the story. I sound gooby, but I'm sure some of you know what I mean.
So now it's 10:19 and I will be headed to bed. We are going to the Lucas' Lifegroup tomorrow...it's our first married Sunday School experience....I feel kind of nervous, and I dont know why. Maybe it's because of our age difference--I'm 22 and Kurt is 27, and we don't fit in anywhere. Most 22 year olds aren't married yet and are still in singles, and Kurt's age group are well into the baby stage. We are married, with an age difference, with no kids. So it's a challenge. Also---and I'm being very transparent---as the pastor's daughter, I am judged by a totally different set of standards than everyone else. I am NOT putting myself on a pedestal or being self-righteous. That's just the way things are. I guess my whole life, it's just been me and my family. We've just always been "loners" in the Lifegroup sense, because Daddy couldn't go to a class, so it would be kind of weird for Mom to go alone...so she has always taught preschool (and that's where her heart is, anyway). As for us kids, we were always in the children's or youth ministries by default. This is the first time that I am kind of taking an adult step at church. I'm married, and so I'm separate from my family in this sense. So I guess it's kind of intimidating.
An example of being held to a different standard: My mom AND the church secretary got a call from a woman about a wedding gift that she gave me. She said she was "just calling to make sure that I got the gift okay," when she knew good and well I had. It's not like she sent it in the mail. She said she never got a thank-you note, and she was bothered because she talked to her friend who had gotten one "right away." SERIOUSLY?! I have written about 400 thank-you notes. But I know FOR A FACT that I sent this woman a thank-you note. But I will be writing her a new one because otherwise she will have more to talk about with her friends. That's just one of many examples. All that to say, sometimes I just feel like I, and Kurt now, are looked at a little differently. Bless his heart...Kurt got pulled into the glass house :) But you know what? It's MY glass house, and I adore the people (my family) that I live in it with. We have been talked about falsely, told things straight to our faces, and criticized, but we have also watched ministries change people's lives, people come to know Christ, and laughed together more than most families I know. So I will take on the challenge of entering a new Lifegroup class. And on my nametag, I just might write: "Ashley Lancaster, Daugher of the Pastor. Unsolicited comments welcome." Why not just go ahead and give people permission? :)